What exactly is stress, and what can we do about it? Since we are in the midst of Stress Awareness month, here are some ways to identify and learn to cope with stress.
Stress is something that everyone will experience in some way during their life. The unfortunate truth is that the world is full of stressful situations. While some experiences may cause more acute stress than others, everyone has a different threshold and skill set to manage their stress levels and act appropriately under pressure. Learning to cope with stress and finding healthy ways to deal with difficult situations can go a long way in living a healthy and positive life. There is no single definition for stress, but experts typically explain stress as a form of physical, mental, or emotional strain or tension. On its own, stress is not a physical or mental illness – it is a natural way for a person’s body and mind to react to a situation that makes them feel anxious, threatened, or overwhelmed.
People of All Ages Can Feel Stress
According to a 2017 study conducted by the American Psychological Association, the most common sources of stress reported among Americans were the “future of our nation,” money, work, the political climate, and violence/crime. These triggers might lead us to think that stress is an adult phenomenon. However, stress occurs in children and teens as well, and it is particularly important for them to learn healthy ways to cope so that they build resilience and habits that support their long-term health. Here are some common sources of stress among young children:
- separation anxiety when their parents or trusted adults are not present
- pressure to fit in with peers
- a full schedule that limits their ability to unwind and relax
- domestic disturbances
- instability reflected in their parents’ behavior through parents’ substance use, neglect, bitterness toward other people, or poor relationships
- world news and things kids learn about on television or the internet
- family upsets, such as a sick relative or a death in the family
It can be difficult to tell when a child is stressed. Young children are most likely to express stress through their bodies. Changes in their sleep patterns, bed wetting, stomach aches, and headaches can all be manifestations of stress. Chronic stress may cause a child to act out or suffer from mood swings. The more mature a child becomes, the more likely they are to display disbelief or shock or express sadness and frustration in response to stress. Stress can also make it hard for people to focus or make decisions. Teens and adults might turn to nicotine, alcohol, or other drugs for a quick fix when they cannot cope.
Stress Takes a Toll on the Body
Long-term stress can prove to be more than just a mental issue. When a person finds himself/herself in a stressful situation, the stress hormones adrenaline and cortisol rush into their bloodstream, leading to an increase in heart rate, blood pressure, and glucose levels. This is the body’s “fight or flight” response and can be helpful in emergencies. Living with a heightened stress response for extended periods can be dangerous and make one susceptible to a number of physical ailments, including:
- Frequent tension headaches
- Depression, and a sense of feeling exhausted or worn down
- Heartburn and acid reflux – stress accelerates the production of stomach acids, leading to a sense of burning and discomfort
- Insomnia
- Weakened immunity and increased risk of contracting colds, flus, and other infectious diseases
- High blood sugar – stress causes the body to release higher levels of glucose into the bloodstream, which can put a person at risk of type 2 diabetes
- Indigestion
- Muscle tension
- Shortness of breath and a racing heartbeat
- Missed periods and problems with fertility in women
Put simply, stress makes the body work too hard, for too long. This causes a stressed person to overexert their respiratory and circulatory systems, increasing their risk of a heart attack or stroke. Under chronic stress, a person might experience issues with more than one part of their body.
Managing Your Stress Response and Caring for Stressed Children
In some cases, the things that cause stress in our lives are not something we have the power to change. At any age, people can avoid becoming overwhelmed by recognizing when they do and do not have control and what they can let go of. If a situation is outside your control, focus instead on taking control of your reactions and training your mind on something that brings you a sense of calm and agency. Children will absorb the influences of their parents and other adults, and stress in their environment will inevitably rub off on them. Adults and parents should focus on managing their own stress response as a way of being responsible for the children in their care.
When it comes to helping children cope with stress, start by giving the body what it needs. Encourage children to get enough sleep and good nutrition. Be sure that they aren’t eating close to bedtime, and encourage children to spend at least an hour each day exercising. Make time to talk and spend time with the children in your care each day. Help them identify their feelings, and support them in unpacking difficult situations. If a child resists talking about what is bothering them, don’t force it. You’re likely to earn their trust by simply being around them, spending quality time, and creating a welcoming space. If a child is willing to share their experiences, talk about what may be causing the stress they feel. Act as a partner to them so that you can arrive at practical solutions together, like cutting back on extracurricular activities, spending more time doing things that relax them, taking up a physical hobby or sport, or keeping a journal.
You also can help children become more skilled at coping by anticipating stressful situations and helping children prepare for them. For example, let a child know ahead of time when you plan on being apart for an extended period or if they have a medical appointment coming up. Reassure children that it’s OK to feel frustrated, scared, lonely, or anxious and that other people share those feelings. Remind children that you have felt similar feelings and that you are confident that they can handle difficult experiences. In fact, talking about your own sources of stress can be instructive for children. Adults can show that they are willing to discuss tough topics and are ready to speak openly by modeling vulnerability.
At Maryvale, we work with children of all backgrounds to cultivate relationship skills and grow in their ability to collaborate and empathize with others. Through our Early Childhood Education program, our After School offerings, and our mental health services, we support children and their families to build resiliency and tap into their inner strength.
